Hi friends. Welcome back if you’re an OG subscriber and a warm welcome if you’re new here! This Thursday Thread is where I pose a question and we share perspective, experience, and insights in the comments. It’s the highlight of my week sharing space and reading all of your responses. I’ll be tapping in tonight and throughout the day tomorrow. I just got back from Portugal (and have tons to share) and will be getting back to answers on the previous thread as well. Today’s question is below.
7/100 How do you celebrate yourself?
Photo from my friend Valerie’s 30th birthday taken on 35mm film. (2021)
I was leaving an event in Manhattan a few weeks ago and spotted a poster that said: “take your pleasure seriously.“
Gosh, I love that. And I think it wonderfully translates to the celebration and acknowledgment of self via small delights sprinkled throughout the day, acts of kindness and care, indulgence and challenge. I don’t think we should save celebration for some far-off date we have no guarantee of seeing.
Below is my lil off-the-top list. Can’t wait to read your answers!
singing at the top of my lungs. something 90’s, preferably neo-soul.
dancing. badly.
the first sip of champagne.
pizza.
pour-over.
a few drops of my favorite scent in the living room diffuser.
a tribal woman-king thrust after the final rep of a hard-ass workout.
35mm film.
dreary day, juicy book.
morning walk.
trying, like really trying (at anything), and giving myself a literal pat on the back.
Dhayana! Thank you so much, my dear. Truly means the world.
I'm working on #1. So important and necessary. Convinced we are the same person by your list, or at the least, long lost sisters. I LOVE Princess and the Frog. Celebrating you from this side, Dhayana. Thank you for sharing ❤️
“I don’t think we should save celebration for some far-off date we have no guarantee of seeing.”
I couldn’t agree with you more, & I think it is gonna take some unlearning to get out of the school of thought that we should only celebrate the “big” moments or huge accomplishments.
Since becoming a mom, I celebrate simply getting through the day…or making it through a temper tantrum without losing my patience. LOL. As someone who previously only celebrated achieving my career goals or personal goals, this has been hard to do, but so worth it.
Here’s my lil list:
1. Doing absolutely nothing.
2. Getting fries + a frosty/ice cream to dip them in.
3. Binging a show or watching a movie.
4. Champagne, champagne, champagne.
5. Positive self-talk + affirmations.
I’ve enjoyed reading the other lists, & have a few things to add to my own.
I love singing and dancing silly by myself. Getting myself chocolate more. Indulging in a good movie while cuddling with my plushie. Purchasing something nice for myself. Remembering to be proud of myself.
This question made me realize I have not been doing this enough! Celebrating myself sounds so yummy, especially when it is intentional. Thank you for the reminder. My List:
1. Sipping a rich Reishi cardamon Chia tea latte with homemade almond milk.
2. Drinking a tea of any kind while staring at the trees outside my window.
3. Going to the beach to watch the sunset.
4. Going to any body of water where I can commune with my Spirit.
5. Rose water, crystal bath. I put all the Juju in this bath and soak until kingdom come.
6.Traveling, road trips, adventures of any kind.
7.Watching cooking documentaries. One of my favorites is High on the Hog on Netflix.
8.Watching Disney movies with my son. To see him light up over my childhood favorites makes me feel so seen.
9. Drink a full-body Merlot paired with moonlight and heavy Jazz.
10. Going to an intimate live music show.
11. Writing, painting, drawing, just creating.
12. Womb-centered dancing.
13. Eating African spiced dishes.
14. Laughing outside on warm nights with friends, candlelight, frankincense and myrrh burning, and a home-blended tea.
15. Reading a Rumi book during a warm summer rain.
Welcome back from Portugal, Nneka!! Thank you so much for this question, I feel like I have not expanded new ways to celebrate myself but here are some that always make it:
1. Tuesdays' hard ass leg day workouts in the morning.
2. Watching the stars and the moon in whatever shape it is in that night.
3. Listening to "By Your Side" by Sade over and over.
4. Getting home before 6 pm after a long day and immediately laying in the couch to do nothing.
5. Binge watching a full-on season of a beloved tv show.
6. Tea. Super hot black tea, always.
7. Poetry. writing it, reading it, performing it, you name it.
Yayyy! More celebrations this year, Samerah! Following your lead on this. "As long as I'm not in front of the camera" lmaooo. The struggle is real. Allllll these things on your list. DELIGHTFUL. Also...shoot that damn shot! 😭❤️
Hi Nneka, I want to start by saying that I absolutely love your newsletter and content on Instagram, always looking forward to it✨
I celebrate myself by:
1) Allowing my mind and body to rest without feeling guilty and without limitations.
2) Buying fruit tarts or m&ms (my favorites).
3) Enjoying a glass of wine while rewatching my fav Disney movie “Princess and the Frog.”
4) Affirming myself of how beautiful my spiritual gifts are and that every achievement contributes to the bigger picture.
Dhayana! Thank you so much, my dear. Truly means the world.
I'm working on #1. So important and necessary. Convinced we are the same person by your list, or at the least, long lost sisters. I LOVE Princess and the Frog. Celebrating you from this side, Dhayana. Thank you for sharing ❤️
Hey Nneka. Welcome back from Portugal!!! And thank you for the "Portugal Day 1" video.
I normally celebrate myself by;
1. Buying Chocolate fudge cake from my favourite cafe
2. Speaking words of affirmation to myself in the mirror.
3. Order in pizza
4. Gift myself with more sleeping hours over the weekend
5. Lastly, singing along to my favourites' playlist
Cannot wait for all the Portugal stories. Stay blessed.
love, Joyce from Uganda.
Hi Joyce! Thank you, beautiful.
You list is so, so delicious (fudge cake!) 😭❤️ thank you for sharing and I can't wait for you to see the rest of the Portugal series!
"small delights sprinkled throughout the day" — love this, pure joy!
Here's my list:
1. Lo-fi and jazz in the background while painting.
2. the first deep breath on an evening stroll on the beach.
3. my latest obsession: warmed Cinnabon mini Pecan bites. lol.
4. photo walks.
5. cozied up, wrapped in a throw with a glass of wine + a good movie.
“I don’t think we should save celebration for some far-off date we have no guarantee of seeing.”
I couldn’t agree with you more, & I think it is gonna take some unlearning to get out of the school of thought that we should only celebrate the “big” moments or huge accomplishments.
Since becoming a mom, I celebrate simply getting through the day…or making it through a temper tantrum without losing my patience. LOL. As someone who previously only celebrated achieving my career goals or personal goals, this has been hard to do, but so worth it.
Here’s my lil list:
1. Doing absolutely nothing.
2. Getting fries + a frosty/ice cream to dip them in.
3. Binging a show or watching a movie.
4. Champagne, champagne, champagne.
5. Positive self-talk + affirmations.
I’ve enjoyed reading the other lists, & have a few things to add to my own.
My Friday night pizza, a glass of wine and a sweet treat.....no guilt and I have it every Friday night alone and happy.
I love singing and dancing silly by myself. Getting myself chocolate more. Indulging in a good movie while cuddling with my plushie. Purchasing something nice for myself. Remembering to be proud of myself.
This is lovely and very aligned because yesterday I was just chatting with someone about celebrations.
Here's my list, In no particular order just what comes to mind.
1. Dancing to bachata or merengue in my living room with my kids.
2. Making some Cafe con leche, smelling it and hearing it brewing *chef's kiss*
3. A long hot shower, or a candlelit bath.
4. Some live jazz music. (Here for it)
5. Filling out my affirmation journal.
6. Kettle Corn popcorn with peanut m&ms
7. Trying out new food spots with good company
8. A good urban fiction at night with my booklight (Love me a hood book)
9. Trap Yoga (Nothing like a good stretch and twerk work out)
10. Calligraphy, give me pen, ink, and some handmade paper
11. Baking.
12. Painting
13. Morning walks.
14. Being by the water
15. Plants, Plants, Plants.
This question made me realize I have not been doing this enough! Celebrating myself sounds so yummy, especially when it is intentional. Thank you for the reminder. My List:
1. Sipping a rich Reishi cardamon Chia tea latte with homemade almond milk.
2. Drinking a tea of any kind while staring at the trees outside my window.
3. Going to the beach to watch the sunset.
4. Going to any body of water where I can commune with my Spirit.
5. Rose water, crystal bath. I put all the Juju in this bath and soak until kingdom come.
6.Traveling, road trips, adventures of any kind.
7.Watching cooking documentaries. One of my favorites is High on the Hog on Netflix.
8.Watching Disney movies with my son. To see him light up over my childhood favorites makes me feel so seen.
9. Drink a full-body Merlot paired with moonlight and heavy Jazz.
10. Going to an intimate live music show.
11. Writing, painting, drawing, just creating.
12. Womb-centered dancing.
13. Eating African spiced dishes.
14. Laughing outside on warm nights with friends, candlelight, frankincense and myrrh burning, and a home-blended tea.
15. Reading a Rumi book during a warm summer rain.
Welcome back from Portugal, Nneka!! Thank you so much for this question, I feel like I have not expanded new ways to celebrate myself but here are some that always make it:
1. Tuesdays' hard ass leg day workouts in the morning.
2. Watching the stars and the moon in whatever shape it is in that night.
3. Listening to "By Your Side" by Sade over and over.
4. Getting home before 6 pm after a long day and immediately laying in the couch to do nothing.
5. Binge watching a full-on season of a beloved tv show.
6. Tea. Super hot black tea, always.
7. Poetry. writing it, reading it, performing it, you name it.
Love, always.
Yayyy! More celebrations this year, Samerah! Following your lead on this. "As long as I'm not in front of the camera" lmaooo. The struggle is real. Allllll these things on your list. DELIGHTFUL. Also...shoot that damn shot! 😭❤️