Nneka, loved the video! Thank you for inviting us to take a moment to pause and do some reflecting. I’m actually going to journal and reflect on this question more before I sleep tonight. What initially comes to mind for me is: be patient, you are right on time. I’m going through a career pivot and in the midst of that, a shedding of identities and outgrowing things. The journey has been challenging. My patience wavers and I get annoyed and frustrated. I would tell my little self that change and growth can sometimes feel painful and confusing, but it’s worth it. To be the person you were created to be, it’s worth it. To be in alignment, it’s worth it. Additionally, I would tell my younger self to remember that, “just because you don’t know where you’re going, doesn’t mean you’re headed in the wrong direction….the path becomes more clear as you walk it”. These are words by the lovely Iya Ehime Ora 🤎 And they’ve been a great source of comfort on my current path.
"I would tell my little self that change and growth can sometimes feel painful and confusing, but it’s worth it. To be the person you were created to be, it’s worth it. To be in alignment, it’s worth it." Saving these words, Darielle! Thank you so so much for sharing ♥️
Personally, I’d tell my younger self (especially my teenage self) -I’m currently 23-that it gets better with God and time. She walks into seasons of greatness and endless blessings. And therefore she has to practice discipline and gratitude so that she doesn’t lose everything.
I’d also tell her to prepare to love herself more and put herself first. She has spent many years putting others on a pedestal but this year, she works on prioritizing herself.
I’d tell her that regardless of all the self improvement, it’s okay to take a breather and rest. That rest is not something bad.
Lastly, I’d tell her that life gets easier but that doesn’t mean that there’s no difficulty whatsoever. She has to focus way less on the negative things and remember to cherish the good.
Terrified 🥺 doing the same things and hoping just hoping for different results. i want to change i want to uproot, but it all feels so damn isolating 😢 how do i bring my desires to fruition?! This year i experienced an unimaginable loss. i’m trying to move forward but i hurt. Also, i feel like i don’t have the right to grieve this loss. younger self💔 choose life! Those little moments are huge! Cherish good people!. Also, beloved you won’t always get a proper goodbye💔
Nneka, I’m trying to gather all my words because I’m still processing what I just witnessed. Thank you for your transparency, vulnerability and sharing of yourself but most of all giving us, the reader, the opportunity to do some self reflection of our own.
Initially I thought I would’ve written a letter to my 8 year old self but then I realized I’d write it to my 29 year old self. I’d let her know that it’s ok to take risks sometimes and I shouldn’t let past mistakes or failures hold me back from taking risks. I can relinquish control and I don’t have to know all the details of how things are going to come together before taking that first step. I can trust myself because my strength is that no matter how many times life tries to knock me down I always get back up. Whether crawling or putting one foot in front of the other, I keep pressing forward so it’s ok to start over as many times as necessary because in the end it all works out. Usually even better than I could have ever imagined.
I’m always in awe of your writing, & this piece is no different. It’s amazing how your style is adaptable to the purpose of the message + what you’re trying to convey.
While I’m not sure what I want to write to myself for this year, this chapter, I am inspired by your commitment to “do the thing.”
I'd tell my younger self to be ready for growth. I'd say to her that letting people know what you are going through is vulnerability and not so bad after all. The right people will take your story and help you through/along it. I'd tell her to give herself grace when she fails and pick herself back up. I'd tell her that executing more than planning is the way to go. I'd tell her to stop avoiding the ideas of creativity and adventure always in her mind and instead lean into them. I'd tell her that she'll find pleasure in the simple yet beautiful art of crotchety and she'll hunger even more to create.
I will then remind her that other people's opinions of her don't matter and that she should not dwell long on them but instead focus on that which brings her joy and satisfaction.
I'd tell her to choose one thing to focus on at a time. This will yield better results. Heck, I'd tell her to focus on the progress and journey rather than perfection and results.
I'd tell her that her body is about to change in so many beautifully complex ways. She'll discover what amazing bursts of pleasure can emanate from within her. But I'd caution her to be wary of who and what she gives herself to. Lest she stands the chance of being wounded and hurt.
I'd tell her that her dream of being a doctor is still valid despite so many doubts and obstacles. I'd tell her she's doing a good job at advancing her career despite the limitations of being an international student in the States. Nothing worth having comes easy after all. I know she'll be homesick but I'll remind her that no situation is permanent and that she should rely on the chatting and calling technology made available to us.
I'd congratulate her on finally quitting vaping. It was not an easy thing to do and yet here she is. I'd tell her to remember past successes to break the other self-destructing habits of drug use. The drug she should now learn about is good organic alive food that will fuel my body and spirit.
I'd tell her to own her experience and story, appreciate her uniqueness, and understand that she too has a place in this world. Comparison to others can be harmful.
I'd tell my younger self (and my present self) to rest. To not feel guilty about resting. To take time out to breathe and enjoy the mundane aspects of life. I'd tell her to chase what she wants even if it doesn't make sense to anyone else. I'd urge her to believe in her desire to pursue what she desires and to chase it.
This post is amazing. And definitely aligned with the where I am in life right now. This is what I wrote:
“I would take you by the hand, and gently walk you forward. You are allowed to want, and you are allowed to ask for what you want. You are allowed to have. You are allowed to be yourself, fully. There is no one outside of you that you need approval from. Give yourself permission to be. And in that being, do. My hand is a steady pressure in yours. Do you feel me tugging? I’m here. Come on.”
I’m not sure which version of me I’m writing to. Maybe the version of me that was still overwhelmed by everything she wanted to do, and was still too afraid to name what she wanted. I think she’s a more recent younger version of me, but she overlapping into present me a little bit too.
Nnekaaaaa....thank you so much! I've been captivated by your words, visuals, and storytelling for years, and I'm still in awe. Your storytelling keeps touching and inspiring me every single time. Grateful for the nudge to put pen to paper—this felt really good. I’m going to try to keep it up for the next 99 questions!
—
To my recent self who could use some encouragement to hold on, to believe that she will soon find her fullest and truest self:
Semriye, you're on the brink of meeting her—the one who has seemed so elusive, a distant and idealized vision whose existence you’ve long doubted. She is neither fantasy nor delusion. Your countless encounters have been too brief for you to clearly see her face or recognize her voice. You’ve yet to fully understand how she carries herself, who she surrounds herself with, how little she cares about people's perceptions, how she's dismantling her ego day by day, or how she dares to live—boldly and outwardly.
You’ve searched for her in the darkest corners of your heart, uncertain how she could ever emerge from such shadows. You’ve longed for her through both joy and pain, often questioning how much time is too much before you should let her go.
But your graceful resilience and faith in her will be rewarded. Your constant fear of never meeting her has obscured the fact that you’ve been preparing for her all along. You will earn back her trust, and she will forgive every mistake made on your journey to finding her. She will love you wholly, in a way that feels unfamiliar to you now. I know you’re beginning to sense it. Focus on progress, not perfection; you don’t have to rush, just keep showing up and moving towards her.
I promise you will know her soon—not in another life, but in this one.
this spoke to me in levels i could not fathom. it was beautiful to watch. beautiful to read. at 27, i feel like i’ve lost so much of my youth to being afraid. i was always scared to do things because i was afraid to be bad it, and now i feel like it’s too late. so if i could tell my little self something, i would tell her that it’s okay if you’re bad at it, because you can get better. i would tell her to do all the things that she wants to do and that she’s capable of doing all of them.
thank you for this 🫶🏻 i don’t remember how i discovered your sub stack but today when i decided to start my own and reopened my account, i was already subscribed to you and this came up. i think it was meant to be somehow.
The video was so good, I loved the transitions and just the simple things you did in the video. I love how it went back and forth between me feeling like I am watching a film and podcast. I am someone who loves videography so this was very interesting to watch on a learning level as well. The stage of my life that I am in I would tell my current self to be resilient. I think it’s important for me to trust in myself even if I have no clue as to where to start or go. Gain your confidence back and just take it one step at a time. Often I feel like I am playing catch up with the world around me. As if I am in this big race and are constantly being lapped and left behind. So I would remind myself that I am on my own path, running my own race.
Nneka, loved the video! Thank you for inviting us to take a moment to pause and do some reflecting. I’m actually going to journal and reflect on this question more before I sleep tonight. What initially comes to mind for me is: be patient, you are right on time. I’m going through a career pivot and in the midst of that, a shedding of identities and outgrowing things. The journey has been challenging. My patience wavers and I get annoyed and frustrated. I would tell my little self that change and growth can sometimes feel painful and confusing, but it’s worth it. To be the person you were created to be, it’s worth it. To be in alignment, it’s worth it. Additionally, I would tell my younger self to remember that, “just because you don’t know where you’re going, doesn’t mean you’re headed in the wrong direction….the path becomes more clear as you walk it”. These are words by the lovely Iya Ehime Ora 🤎 And they’ve been a great source of comfort on my current path.
"I would tell my little self that change and growth can sometimes feel painful and confusing, but it’s worth it. To be the person you were created to be, it’s worth it. To be in alignment, it’s worth it." Saving these words, Darielle! Thank you so so much for sharing ♥️
Thank you!! 🤎
Thank you so much for this Nneka♥️🥹.
Personally, I’d tell my younger self (especially my teenage self) -I’m currently 23-that it gets better with God and time. She walks into seasons of greatness and endless blessings. And therefore she has to practice discipline and gratitude so that she doesn’t lose everything.
I’d also tell her to prepare to love herself more and put herself first. She has spent many years putting others on a pedestal but this year, she works on prioritizing herself.
I’d tell her that regardless of all the self improvement, it’s okay to take a breather and rest. That rest is not something bad.
Lastly, I’d tell her that life gets easier but that doesn’t mean that there’s no difficulty whatsoever. She has to focus way less on the negative things and remember to cherish the good.
Can’t wait for letter 2.
Stay blessed ✨
go to war with your conditioning. This phrase will stick with me. Thank you.
thank you so much for taking the time, Heidi ♥️
Terrified 🥺 doing the same things and hoping just hoping for different results. i want to change i want to uproot, but it all feels so damn isolating 😢 how do i bring my desires to fruition?! This year i experienced an unimaginable loss. i’m trying to move forward but i hurt. Also, i feel like i don’t have the right to grieve this loss. younger self💔 choose life! Those little moments are huge! Cherish good people!. Also, beloved you won’t always get a proper goodbye💔
It is okay to grieve! To try and process your grief, to take out time to seek yourself. It is okay.🫶🏽
I’m trying. Right now my living situation is very uncomfortable so processing the grief with grace is HARD
and never ever internalized not being chosen💔
NNEKA!!! This was soooo goood!! Thank you 🫶🏾❤️ I NEEDED to hear this. Wow. You're a phenomenal writer and visual artist.
Appreciate you so much, Bee!! 🥹♥️
I'd tell my younger self to face the work squarely, nobody is coming to save her.
Squarely indeed! If we don't do it, unfortunately, no one will. Thank you for sharing, my dear❤️
I love this!!🥹 you are an amazing writer!!❤❤❤
Thank you so much, Aisha! ❤️
You’re a gift!!!!!
YOU are, Arielle! 😭❤️
Nneka, I’m trying to gather all my words because I’m still processing what I just witnessed. Thank you for your transparency, vulnerability and sharing of yourself but most of all giving us, the reader, the opportunity to do some self reflection of our own.
Initially I thought I would’ve written a letter to my 8 year old self but then I realized I’d write it to my 29 year old self. I’d let her know that it’s ok to take risks sometimes and I shouldn’t let past mistakes or failures hold me back from taking risks. I can relinquish control and I don’t have to know all the details of how things are going to come together before taking that first step. I can trust myself because my strength is that no matter how many times life tries to knock me down I always get back up. Whether crawling or putting one foot in front of the other, I keep pressing forward so it’s ok to start over as many times as necessary because in the end it all works out. Usually even better than I could have ever imagined.
Nneka,
I’m always in awe of your writing, & this piece is no different. It’s amazing how your style is adaptable to the purpose of the message + what you’re trying to convey.
While I’m not sure what I want to write to myself for this year, this chapter, I am inspired by your commitment to “do the thing.”
& you do the thing very well my friend. 🤍
I'd tell my younger self to be ready for growth. I'd say to her that letting people know what you are going through is vulnerability and not so bad after all. The right people will take your story and help you through/along it. I'd tell her to give herself grace when she fails and pick herself back up. I'd tell her that executing more than planning is the way to go. I'd tell her to stop avoiding the ideas of creativity and adventure always in her mind and instead lean into them. I'd tell her that she'll find pleasure in the simple yet beautiful art of crotchety and she'll hunger even more to create.
I will then remind her that other people's opinions of her don't matter and that she should not dwell long on them but instead focus on that which brings her joy and satisfaction.
I'd tell her to choose one thing to focus on at a time. This will yield better results. Heck, I'd tell her to focus on the progress and journey rather than perfection and results.
I'd tell her that her body is about to change in so many beautifully complex ways. She'll discover what amazing bursts of pleasure can emanate from within her. But I'd caution her to be wary of who and what she gives herself to. Lest she stands the chance of being wounded and hurt.
I'd tell her that her dream of being a doctor is still valid despite so many doubts and obstacles. I'd tell her she's doing a good job at advancing her career despite the limitations of being an international student in the States. Nothing worth having comes easy after all. I know she'll be homesick but I'll remind her that no situation is permanent and that she should rely on the chatting and calling technology made available to us.
I'd congratulate her on finally quitting vaping. It was not an easy thing to do and yet here she is. I'd tell her to remember past successes to break the other self-destructing habits of drug use. The drug she should now learn about is good organic alive food that will fuel my body and spirit.
I'd tell her to own her experience and story, appreciate her uniqueness, and understand that she too has a place in this world. Comparison to others can be harmful.
Lastly, I'd remind her to take it easy.
I'd tell my younger self (and my present self) to rest. To not feel guilty about resting. To take time out to breathe and enjoy the mundane aspects of life. I'd tell her to chase what she wants even if it doesn't make sense to anyone else. I'd urge her to believe in her desire to pursue what she desires and to chase it.
Thank you, Nneka.
This post is amazing. And definitely aligned with the where I am in life right now. This is what I wrote:
“I would take you by the hand, and gently walk you forward. You are allowed to want, and you are allowed to ask for what you want. You are allowed to have. You are allowed to be yourself, fully. There is no one outside of you that you need approval from. Give yourself permission to be. And in that being, do. My hand is a steady pressure in yours. Do you feel me tugging? I’m here. Come on.”
I’m not sure which version of me I’m writing to. Maybe the version of me that was still overwhelmed by everything she wanted to do, and was still too afraid to name what she wanted. I think she’s a more recent younger version of me, but she overlapping into present me a little bit too.
Thank you so much for this. 🫶🏾
Nnekaaaaa....thank you so much! I've been captivated by your words, visuals, and storytelling for years, and I'm still in awe. Your storytelling keeps touching and inspiring me every single time. Grateful for the nudge to put pen to paper—this felt really good. I’m going to try to keep it up for the next 99 questions!
—
To my recent self who could use some encouragement to hold on, to believe that she will soon find her fullest and truest self:
Semriye, you're on the brink of meeting her—the one who has seemed so elusive, a distant and idealized vision whose existence you’ve long doubted. She is neither fantasy nor delusion. Your countless encounters have been too brief for you to clearly see her face or recognize her voice. You’ve yet to fully understand how she carries herself, who she surrounds herself with, how little she cares about people's perceptions, how she's dismantling her ego day by day, or how she dares to live—boldly and outwardly.
You’ve searched for her in the darkest corners of your heart, uncertain how she could ever emerge from such shadows. You’ve longed for her through both joy and pain, often questioning how much time is too much before you should let her go.
But your graceful resilience and faith in her will be rewarded. Your constant fear of never meeting her has obscured the fact that you’ve been preparing for her all along. You will earn back her trust, and she will forgive every mistake made on your journey to finding her. She will love you wholly, in a way that feels unfamiliar to you now. I know you’re beginning to sense it. Focus on progress, not perfection; you don’t have to rush, just keep showing up and moving towards her.
I promise you will know her soon—not in another life, but in this one.
this spoke to me in levels i could not fathom. it was beautiful to watch. beautiful to read. at 27, i feel like i’ve lost so much of my youth to being afraid. i was always scared to do things because i was afraid to be bad it, and now i feel like it’s too late. so if i could tell my little self something, i would tell her that it’s okay if you’re bad at it, because you can get better. i would tell her to do all the things that she wants to do and that she’s capable of doing all of them.
thank you for this 🫶🏻 i don’t remember how i discovered your sub stack but today when i decided to start my own and reopened my account, i was already subscribed to you and this came up. i think it was meant to be somehow.
The video was so good, I loved the transitions and just the simple things you did in the video. I love how it went back and forth between me feeling like I am watching a film and podcast. I am someone who loves videography so this was very interesting to watch on a learning level as well. The stage of my life that I am in I would tell my current self to be resilient. I think it’s important for me to trust in myself even if I have no clue as to where to start or go. Gain your confidence back and just take it one step at a time. Often I feel like I am playing catch up with the world around me. As if I am in this big race and are constantly being lapped and left behind. So I would remind myself that I am on my own path, running my own race.