Thank you, really. One of the toughest truths I've had to accept is I cannot love people into loving me lol. I wish it were that easy, because I have so much to give, and I just wish it'd fit into the boxes of the ones I'd love to give.
All the patterns, behaviors and results are up to me. There’s no one else in the room, and as much as the outside noise serves a purpose, it only works if I allow it to.
It’s like you post exactly what I am going through. I recently reconnected with someone who has never been in a real relationship with me & will never be with me in that way.
I am finally accepting him for who he is but I will not continue giving myself in that way anymore.
One of the toughest truths is (in the words of Jazmine Sullivan) “Just cause I love you & you love me that doesn’t mean that we ever be.”
Frankie! We're in sync fr. You had me at the Jazmine Sullivan quote! Whew, a tough ass truth indeed. There's light on the other side, friend. Trust me ❤️
One thing I’ve learned: love should never come at my expense. True love liberates. Friendships shouldn’t exist only as long as I stay silent. Love doesn’t want me to shrink. I don’t need to give endlessly; I am enough as I am, fully deserving of love. The right people will love me for exactly that.
i broke up with my partner of almost 2 years this morning and have been feeling guilt and regret and shame all day. this is my first heartbreak and i think probably my first time making a hard decision to choose myself . so seeing the notification from substack say “you can’t change them” made me feel a little religious lol. the tough truth im accepting now is that even if a person does change a little, even if a person is loving and caring , it doesn’t mean it’s wrong to leave them in their process of finding themselves. and sometimes seeing a potential in someone isn’t good enough if they don’t see it in themself . still day one of heartbreak and i feel like lard and evil, but this was very beautifully produced and very helpful to me a 20 year old stranger who feels like my world is ending lol!
Thank you for sharing this during such a tender time, friend. When I was on the brink of ending a "good enough" relationship, an older woman on vacation told me, "Good enough is a dangerous place to be." Big love to you for taking the most courageous step you could for both of you ❤️
I know it’s dark but sometimes changing your behavior doesn’t change how other people perceive or feel about you. Your interactions with others determine how you are allowed to move through the world. You can do everything right and still be the one who gets left out. But I think sometimes you are just not presented with options. So if you are forced between a choice of solitary confinement or the promise that maybe you will have at least one moment — no matter how small — of joy.
One of my toughest truths is that a breakup with a friend is just as heartbreaking as a lover. Either way, people grow apart. Views and life choices no longer aligned. And it’s time to move on
Thank you, really. One of the toughest truths I've had to accept is I cannot love people into loving me lol. I wish it were that easy, because I have so much to give, and I just wish it'd fit into the boxes of the ones I'd love to give.
I feel this so deeply!
There is love you won't have to shrink or break or bend for, Gloria. There is love to come, my friend. Thank you so much for sharing ❤️
All the patterns, behaviors and results are up to me. There’s no one else in the room, and as much as the outside noise serves a purpose, it only works if I allow it to.
1000% my sister. This is a tough, necessary truth to accept. Thank you for sharing, always! ❤️
It’s like you post exactly what I am going through. I recently reconnected with someone who has never been in a real relationship with me & will never be with me in that way.
I am finally accepting him for who he is but I will not continue giving myself in that way anymore.
One of the toughest truths is (in the words of Jazmine Sullivan) “Just cause I love you & you love me that doesn’t mean that we ever be.”
I need to let go with peace.
Frankie! We're in sync fr. You had me at the Jazmine Sullivan quote! Whew, a tough ass truth indeed. There's light on the other side, friend. Trust me ❤️
I truly believe there is light and an new beginning ☺️
One thing I’ve learned: love should never come at my expense. True love liberates. Friendships shouldn’t exist only as long as I stay silent. Love doesn’t want me to shrink. I don’t need to give endlessly; I am enough as I am, fully deserving of love. The right people will love me for exactly that.
So beautifully written, Juan ❤️ "The right people will love me for exactly that." Exactly this.
i broke up with my partner of almost 2 years this morning and have been feeling guilt and regret and shame all day. this is my first heartbreak and i think probably my first time making a hard decision to choose myself . so seeing the notification from substack say “you can’t change them” made me feel a little religious lol. the tough truth im accepting now is that even if a person does change a little, even if a person is loving and caring , it doesn’t mean it’s wrong to leave them in their process of finding themselves. and sometimes seeing a potential in someone isn’t good enough if they don’t see it in themself . still day one of heartbreak and i feel like lard and evil, but this was very beautifully produced and very helpful to me a 20 year old stranger who feels like my world is ending lol!
Thank you for sharing this during such a tender time, friend. When I was on the brink of ending a "good enough" relationship, an older woman on vacation told me, "Good enough is a dangerous place to be." Big love to you for taking the most courageous step you could for both of you ❤️
This is absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing Nneka.
thank you so much for taking the time, Nuvy!
I know it’s dark but sometimes changing your behavior doesn’t change how other people perceive or feel about you. Your interactions with others determine how you are allowed to move through the world. You can do everything right and still be the one who gets left out. But I think sometimes you are just not presented with options. So if you are forced between a choice of solitary confinement or the promise that maybe you will have at least one moment — no matter how small — of joy.
Thank you so much for sharing, Kyle!
One of my toughest truths is that a breakup with a friend is just as heartbreaking as a lover. Either way, people grow apart. Views and life choices no longer aligned. And it’s time to move on